Calm Before the Storm  

Posted by Alex Pendragon

I see it coming. I stand on the two lane strip of bleached asphalt looking to the east and I see a wall of deep purple rising up into the sky, daring to touch Zeus himself, only people around these parts think it's God who rolls these drums, pounding fast and deep and furious and promising winds that will surely tear something up. The peals of thunder in the distance come four, three, two, one second after the fork of brilliance stabs the pines forests beneath it, frying some hapless tree. This is me, a seven year old, staring at wonder at one approaching storm, and this now is me staring in helpless stasis at another storm that comes without color, or thunder, or wet, or anything but pink slips, foreclosures, children crying, and breadwinners preparing to commit suicide rather than face another day of this helplessness.

I am still immersed in the seas of uncertainty I have been wallowing in for years now......daring to accept credit that would ultimately bring me to bankruptcy, fearful of losing home and love and family, paring back all my hopes and dreams and basing my life on a new definition, one more respectful of the concepts of "enough", and "adequate" and "economy" and empathy for that which I tread upon and place a burden on, such as my acre of sand, or the kilowatts of energy I suck from the power lines connected to my home, or the water I draw from my well. Now I look around me and see those orgies of spending on silliness, of keeping up with the Jones only to discover the Jones have always lived far beyond their means and now the Jones are getting evicted. Of seeing "For-Sale" signs in the windows of these pick-up trucks on steroids, driven not by farmers or carpenters but by soccer moms who never once used four-wheel drive and most often drove alone. I've seen properties sold or rented by nice people to not-so-nice families who fly confederate flags or other symbols of hate or exclusion. I see all the quant and cute little shops now closed in St Augustine, because people don't have touristy dollars to waste anymore. And yet, I STILL see advertisements on television for oversized or luxury vehicles that get horrible gas milage, only you can get them for less now. That's right, instead of the price of a modest four-bedroom house, you can get one of these palaces on wheels for the price of a modest THREE bedroom house. But not many people can afford a modest three bedroom house anymore, so maybe a car your whole family can camp out in isn't such a bad deal after all, huh?

The silent hope at MY job, a for-profit hospital, is that they made enough profit before this shit hit the fan that they won't have to start cutting our jobs, thinking of course like bean counters do that patients get taken care of by......ghosts. If anything, our services are needed now as never before, what with the stress of the economy increasing as never before, but then again, getting patients who can PAY for this's going to become a very, very vicious circle and it's going to get very, very ugly if Obama and Congress doesn't get brave and innovative very fast. I won't riot with the rest of the masses. I will simply sit down on the road and let them take me where they want me to starve to death. If my friends or family or country or whoever care enough for me, I will perhaps be helped. We'll see. It took enough of us not really giving a shit about our fellow citizens to get us to where we are at now. How could anybody who really cared about anything except perhaps themselves have voted for George Bush twice in a row? Did I insult anybody just now? Awwwwwwwwwwww. Fuck you and that narcissistic sociopathic self-centered horse you rode in on. How's THAT for an insult?

This post didn't accomplish anything. I know that. It doesn't provide any answers. I offered up a few suggestions in my rants and raves in the past, but anybody who would have thought my opinion was valid or meant anything has no more effect on policy than I do. And those that ARE in any real position to effect change don't read my blog. More the pity. I really AM one brilliant muther and people ought to listen to me. After all, me and all those thousands of other geniuses off their medications can't ALL be wrong, can we?

I've been piddling' around the house today, loading laundry, the dishwasher, feeding the goats, with the iTunes cranked up. I might even plug in the microphone and do some singing myself; there's no other ears to damage within the house right now. The neighbor lady seems to have gotten a deal for us from someone with implements of mass dirt moval, to fill in our lake-sized depressions and smoothing the lane out for an amount that only calls for about fifty bucks a household. Damn good deal; I can only hope these people sharing this road, who, incidentally, own the damn trucks that have been mud-bogging in these holes and making them worse, will fork over the dough so we can get this work done. The weather warmed right back up and we might see some rain this week, but there appears to be another freeze coming up soon. I hate schizophrenic weather.

OK, I tried posting this damn thing once already, almost losing the whole post due to my browser blanking out on me, so I better get this done while the gettin's good. May the wind be at your back, the sun upon your face, and may the road rise up to meet you, and may your own economic stimulus be rich and rewarding! Blessed be, from the Wise Old Idiot of Pendragon Hold, the only sane place left on Earth.

"What's in your head, in your head, zombie, zombie, zombie.........heyheyhey........"

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 28, 2009 at Wednesday, January 28, 2009 . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

3 slick comments

Michael, the most recent issue of Mother Earth News has an article about a guy in California who raises 6,000 pounds of production on 1/10 of an acre. He users some and sells some. With an acre you're sitting on a gold mine that can help weather the storm:

January 28, 2009 at 2:57 PM

it's sad, whether or not it is people snapping at the golden ring or's sad. oftentimes, people are mislead, conned into thinking they can afford more than they can. we're not near as bad at that here in canada but even here i remember the bank teling me the amount i as preapproved ... I was like WHAT???? are you CRAZY and when I was looking dropped $60,000 from what they said I COULD afford....

i feel for people ...especially those that lose their jobs, their livelihood, their lifestyle becuase of the greediness of the big boys.

January 28, 2009 at 7:15 PM


NOT happy Micheal!

January 28, 2009 at 9:46 PM

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